You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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