I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize