I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Randomize
