Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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