All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
