I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize
