Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
