Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
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