In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
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