I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Watching her eat just hurts me
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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