I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I just gift wrapped bread.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
