fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
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