I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Randomize
