At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
as a side note pls kill me
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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