How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
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