At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize