no. you can't hotbox the world.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
