Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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