so explain again why im purple
no
just tell him i said nine months
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize