Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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