Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
