I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
