You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
You pole danced in your parka.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize