Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize