I accidentally had phone sex last night
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
this will be a night to untag.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
