How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I just want to make out with him forever
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Randomize