Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Randomize
