I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
