i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
