is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize