I'm lost and stupid without you.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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