I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I have fence marks all over my body
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Randomize
