he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
whose ass print is on the piano?
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
