It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
His nipple licking is glorious
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
