Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
