Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
i dont even know how to be here
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
Randomize
