The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize