Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
