I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
there was a trapeze. enough said
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
