It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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