Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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