he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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