Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
