we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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