let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
