Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
