Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
My hand turned me down
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Randomize