This is not my ceiling
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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