So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
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