forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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